Enough of being single!?
You’re life is pretty much sorted. You’ve got your career and finances under control, you have a good group of friends and family you can turn to, health wise you’re ok…
Now, it would be so nice to share it with a partner, creating memories, going on holidays, to the movies, cooking together…
It’s decided, you’re gonna meet that perfect partner to enhance your already awesome life!
Here are the 4 steps most people follow when they have finally decided and committed to meeting someone (including the special formula to fast track your success).
1. Getting Ready
It is always interesting to hear people’s strategy when they start dating again.
Making a good first impression is essential to open the door to a match, a conversation, a date, a relationship.
Therefore, the journey often starts with polishing one’s physical appearance.
Loosing weight, changing wardrobe, a new hairstyle… not only make you look good on the outside, but most importantly make you feel good from the inside.
It creates a shift in energy that boosts your self-confidence and makes you more magnetic.
You look happy and everyone wants a bit of what you’re having!
2. Putting Yourself Out There
Now that you look and feel great, don’t stay the best kept secret!
If you’re feeling nervous, it’s working! It only means this is important and worth a try. Go and chase your dream… outside of your comfort zone.
And you might argue that work, kids, other obligations are getting in the way. Nice try my friend! These are typical excuses to procrastinate on your romantic goals.
When there’s a will there’s a way! Will you let fear keep you single for the rest of your life?
If you don’t have time to swipe, go to events, try new activities – where you will definitely have fun and could potentially meet someone – you won’t have time to date and build a relationship.
Whether you choose dating apps, social media groups, concerts, conferences, new hobbies and activities, you’ve got to do something different if you want a different life.
And if you are already doing some of those things, how do you show up”? Like the best girl/boyfriend to be?!
3.Failing & Giving Up
Yes, it is an actual step!
You’ve tried EVERYTHING… ok, maybe just a few… fiiine just one (and don’t roll up your eyes!)…
You put yourself out there ALL THE TIME… maybe just a couple of times… in the last couple of months…
It’s not working!
That’s where you decide to disactivate your dating apps profile(s), binge watch sport/MAFS on TV, while binge eating chips and drinking beer/Chardonnay, decide you want to marry yourself and stay single forever anyway…
So far you’ve only been doing what you thought you were supposed to. Part of you probably anticipated it wouldn’t work, hence why it didn’t work!
Now, you’ve got an opportunity to learn from this experience, either try again with the same loosing formula or try something different.
4. The Special Formula
If you’d really tried everything and were truly open to all opportunities, you would already have met your person.
So what have you NOT tried yet? What else could you do? Or rather, what else could you think?
When you think “it’s too hard”, “I already have so much on in my life”, “I never meet anyone I like”, “all the good ones are already taken”, “people think I…”, your brain is looking for evidence of it.
And when you’re looking for something that’s usually what you find!
This thought triggers emotions of hardship, overwhelm, doubt, despair, shame…
Then you take actions from this emotional state, refusing opportunities with an attempt to simplify your life, being closed off anticipating they would not be good enough anyway or suspecting they are too good to be true, hiding…
Of course the result of your actions can’t be positive! You are rejecting yourself before you can be rejected!
HERE IS THE NEW FORMULA
(and I hear you already being overcritical and in full disbelief! If nothing else has worked, what harm could there be in trying this one?)
Think: I’m excited about being in a relationship, it adds so much goodness to my life, I am so lucky to meet the right person just for me, people think that I’m glowing and so happy (that’s actually full projection of yourself by the way, how do you know what people think!?)
Feel: excitement, abundance, joy, safety, relaxed, trust, pride, happiness
Act: Be curious and ask questions, try new activities and new places, talk to people (whether you fancy them or not, opportunities always come through people/relationships), explore new things you would normally not do and expand your comfort zone and your life
Enjoy: If after all that you haven’t met your partner yet, I can guaranty you will feel totally in love with Life! You won’t need anyone to enhance it but it will be by product. Your energy will be infectious and your perfect partner will appear when you least expect it, like by magic!
To Sum It Up
You can choose to follow the long way everyone is doing to meet your ideal partner.
Or you can do the deep work first, make sure you are fully in charge of your happiness, not delegating or fearing someone might mess it up.
The formula is simple: choose better thoughts, to trigger better emotions, take better actions and get better results.
But are you willing to? How much longer will you postpone your next true Love story?